This is the last week for the Proverbs 31 Woman of Noble Character challenge.
Week 8: Proverbs 31:30-31 Write a post about all your hopes and dreams. Write about something you have always wanted to do or did do. Write a list of all the things you love about your life.
30Favour is deceitful, and abeauty is vain: but a woman that bfeareth the Lord, she shall be praised.
Hopes and dreams, huh? I feel like I write about these all the time. I have funny things I want, but more than what I want to have and do is what I want to be. I want to be the kind of person who can be trusted. I want to be the kind of person who puts others ahead of myself--not in an enabling way, but in a compassionate, charitable way. I want to be a "woman that feareth the Lord" (and not man)--not to be praised but because I know it will bless and enrich my life and the life of my family.
As for something I've always wanted to do....
I have wanted to go to and graduate from college and am very excited that that desire has almost come to fulfillment. I'm glad that it didn't happen when it should have. I'm thankful that the path of my life has led me to the point of doing this now. Had it happened back when I was 21, I don't think I would have appreciated the road I've traveled to get here as much.
As things have gotten more and more stressful these past few months, I have increasingly relied upon my children for many of the things that usually fall to me. I am grateful for these kinds of experiences for my children. There have been many such situations that have made my kids have to stretch--when I've been pregnant, when new babies have been born into our family, when I broke my leg. These are some of these kinds of stretching opportunities for our family. It's been wonderful to see them step up to the plate and build themselves in so many areas. I believe these things make them more well-rounded and capable individuals.
In this particular situation, unlike those of the past, I am completely capable, so it becomes harder and harder to not jump in and do it myself. It is also very difficult to know that the end is in sight and continue to do my best. I want to slack off so bad. I want to go play. I don't want to study, but I know I have to. My hope is to get it done sooner than that deadline, so I'm trying to work my tail off with the hope that the oppression will end (Could I have chosen a more dramatic word?). Once it's over, then I'll get to play, and I am so looking forward to that. Work before play, right? But then there's the "all work and no play" situation that I seem to be in right now--not very in balance.
I sat down with the kids on Friday and we discussed the need for them to continue to help. I told them how much I appreciated them stepping up. I explained the situation the best that I could and told them why it was so important that they hang in there with me. I realized during this conversation that my reasons for doing this were completely different than they would have been during my early 20s. First of all, back then, no conversation like this would have been necessary or even possible.
I need to do this for my family. If anything were to happen to the Warden, I'd be raising seven children by myself. To have a college degree will make the chance of good employment much more possible; although, I know I'm going to need more than this bachelors degree, so I know that there is more education in my future, but I didn't tell them that; plus, it's so much farther in the future that it's not a necessary part of our conversation right now.
Added to that the fact that the classes I've taken have enriched my life as a mom. Many classes have helped me learn skills that I've needed badly and wouldn't have obtained in any other way. Going to school has been some much needed "me" time. Most importantly, though, is the fact that it's been a great opportunity for my kids to see me study too. I am hopeful that they've learned how important getting an education is.
A list of all the things I love about my life? Really? All of them? Okay, that's going to have to be a whole post of its own.
To be continued....