Cutting Ties with the Laundry Room

It seems like this is a topic I used to blog about a lot.  It was a continual struggle.   Since a friend has asked me to share how we handle laundry at our house, and it's been awhile, I thought I'd share how we currently do things around here.

I used to have HUGE control issues with laundry.  As our family grew, it got crazier.  I taught my children, from a very young age, how to do the laundry--how to use the machines, how much detergent to use, which buttons to push, etc., but as far as letting them do their own, I honestly couldn't figure out how to detach myself from the never-ending spin cycle.  I HAD to do it.  Our machines hardly ever rested.  It was a daily chore.  How was I ever going to let someone else into my chaos.

As I struggled more and more and became more and more resentful of the washer and dryer (that became increasingly inefficient), I knew something HAD to give.  There had to be something I was missing.

It was at this point that I re-learned a lesson that I'm sure I had learned and re-learned ever since I became a mom.  It was--"Never do for a child what that child can do for himself."  In order to free myself from this crazy way of doing things, I had to hand some of it over to them.

So, here's the plan.  Every child who is in middle school and older does his/her own laundry.  They each have their own day.  I get Monday, Wednesday, and Saturday, and I do the laundry for the Warden and Inmates #4 and younger.  I also do most of the towels and other household items, but they know that if they have room for more items in a load, they can throw in towels, blankets, sheets, or whatever they can find in the laundry room that might need washing.

Inmate #1 has Tuesdays; #2 has Thursdays; #3 has Fridays.   We are to be done and out of the laundry room by midnight each day.  As of next year, #4 will have Wednesdays; he has already expressed his anxiety of going to middle school.  When I asked him why, he replied with something I didn't expect, it wasn't worry about going to another school, it was, "Because then I have to do my own laundry." 

At this point, I know there have been weeks when they've forgotten to do their laundry.  I know there have been times when they've run out of clean clothes, and darn it, I know they've not folded things at times, but the beautiful thing is.....It's not my problem!  That's what I love about it.

In the past, on my days, I've taught the little ones how to throw a load into the wash.  I've kind of let this go, but I need to reimplement this way of doing things.  #s 4 and 5 know how, but I don't ask them to do it very often.  That's going to change--today.  Won't they be excited when they get home?

Oh, the other thing we do is that I don't put one load of laundry away except for sometimes (very rarely) my own.  If I'm willing to wash, dry and fold, they get to put away.


The one thing I noticed, when we started doing things this way, was that laundry actually had an end.  I was able to cut ties with the laundry room.  It was amazing how liberated I felt.