Thursday, April 24, 2008

The Price to be Paid

The day started off with a BANG. First thing, one of the kids wanted some hot cider (a big fave in our home) as said child (too short to reach the microwave, which is above the stove) climbed off the counter with the cup of freshly made cider, saying, "I love hot cider," the cup slipped and down it crashed--cider everywhere, cup in about ten pieces. That child sat on the edge of the counter and cried over the cup that grandma had given him two Valentine's Day's ago--a very treasured possession.
About twenty minutes later, same child had been asked to clear the breakfast dishes from the table. Instead of putting them in the sink, they ended up on the counter. Teagen came walking up, pulled the edge of the bowl, with milk still in it. I wasn't quick enough, and all I could do was watch the milk cascade down the three drawers and onto the floor, where it mingled with any stickiness that might have been left from the just cleaned up cider.

I am not a huge home decorator, never been one, wasn't raised by one, but that doesn't mean I dont' want to be one. Someday I'd really like to have a cute home and have stuff stashed for that very purpose. Today it was reemphasized to me why I'm not one, though. About twenty minutes after the cider and milk incidents, I went upstairs to finish getting my hair and make up done. The older kids had emerged by this time and the elementary kids were off, so I felt I was safe. I'm putting my mascara on, and I hear a crash. Honestly, I didn't even flinch.

A few years ago, I went to a candle party and purchased a very cute set of three ghosts. They have emerged every Halloween since as a little reminder to me that someday, I will have a future full of cuteness, and I will do more stuff like them. Need I say more about the crash this morning? Sigh!

The one thing I loved about this incident is that not only did I not flinch, but I didn't move either when Quinlan hollered up, "Mom, Teagen broke one of the ghosts!" Next thing I heard from her was, "Gannon, can you get me the dustpan?" I loved that my kids didn't need me to clean up the mess.

The reason the first child was on the counter this morning was the same reason Quinlan felt she could clean up after her baby brother. My mother by marriage (the term I prefer for Joi) once told me early on to "never do for a child what that child can do for himself." I have tried very hard during the past fourteen years to implement those words. I know there are consequences to this--like broken cups and cider everywhere, but I hope to learn to be unflinching as my children learn to be self-sufficient.

Someday maybe I'll learn to value stuff more, but as for now, it's just stuff, so I'll just enjoy the cute homes of my friends and sit and bask in it all and breathe in the cuteness and think, "Someday....Someday...."


Tonya said...

Don't cry over spilled milk! I love that you didn't even flinch and that Quinlan was so on top of taking care of business. Joi's words are great. Kids do need to learn self reliance...did you go to the parenting class at women's conference? If not ,see the update on my blog.

lynda said...

can I tell you how amazing I think you are!! I think back to those first days of little Quinlan and Josh and us, not really having a clue, just learning along the way to now....5 and 6 kids later and so much smarter!I love your blog site, it makes me realize I'm not alone in this life of motherhood! Lynda

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